*Sometimes it is so easy to get wrapped up in what is wrong with the world, that we forget to celebrate the love and goodness that is in our lives. I wanted to do an interview series about modern relationships and their dynamics. What do you celebrate about your relationship? What keeps you and your partner together? Let's hear it and remember that even with all that is wrong with the outside world, sometimes the best spot is in the arms of your cherished partner!
xoxo Katty Delux
Blayne & Chelsea
30 & 25
Just shy of 3 years (January 20, 2012 is our dating anniversary)
Married as of last summer (July 27, 2013 is our wedding anniversary)
About 4 years, however, we’ll both be honest and say we don’t remember much of the first year that we “knew each other.” We basically just saw each other at a lot of parties, where there was alcohol, so he’ll just tell you I knew this hot blonde chick came into my parties a lot and I’ll say I vaguely remember a burly man standing in the corner.
After our first date we immediately set a date for date number 2. We hooked up during date #2 for the first time and shortly after hooking up he asked me to be his girlfriend. He said he didn’t like the terms, hanging out or talking, and when he found a girl that he knew he liked he wanted to make sure she was his own. By date #3 I was basically living with him, however I continued to pay rent at a separate location and always “packed a bag” instead of leaving belongings behind. It was about 6 months down the road that I severed my ties with my roommates and just moved into his apartment.
Initially I was purely in it for looks and the sex. I had been screwed over so many times by the time I met Blayne that I had decided to date like a dude. I was going to sleep with whoever and do whatever. But then on our first date he cooked for me, homemade Indian Tacos. Down to the homemade fry bread. I mean come on, what kind of guy knows how to do that? I was hooked. We talked for hours that night too. That is still my favorite part of our relationship, the way that we can just talk for hours. It’s like we were instant best friends.
My favorite thing is oddly also the same thing that sometimes gets on my nerves. Blayne is very very protective over me. He is like a true knight in shining armor that always treats me like a damsel in distress. He carries the car seat out to the car for me. He makes sure I have gas in my car when I’m only going a few miles away. He always asks silly questions about where I’m going and how long I’ll be gone. Often times it just gets on my nerves because I am a very independent person, but deep down I long to have someone take care of me. It feels so good somedays to come home to a true knight in shining armor.
We do live together, we now own a house together. As I mentioned earlier we’ve lived together for basically the entirety of our relationship. I wouldn’t change a thing!
We have 1 child, our son Cash, and a Great Dane/Boxer mix named Brantley. We had a Shephard mix together in our previous child that we were both heartbroken when we had to get rid of her. She had an issue with children, she was adopted and abused in her previous life. (Blayne even cried when we returned her to the shelter and they said they had to put her down…he’s a big teddy bear.)
What’s odd is I know my own secret and often times don’t use it. My secret is keeping the fun in things regardless of the fact that we are now parents. Obviously we can’t spend every weekend at the lake during the summer getting drunk or go out the bars as often as we used to. However, I try to come up with fun things that the whole family can do. When we do go out and do fun things we always come home feeling the most connected and happy. I also believe keeping sex alive in a relationship is very important to a relationship, especially one with a child involved, this is the piece of advice I have to keep reminding myself of. I mean it was our most favorite part of dating so why should we not enjoy it now?
Try your very best to not forget why you started to love that person. Obviously people change, even in relationships, but the main reason you got together shouldn’t change much and as long as you keep that original idea of that person in mind you will always be able to return to that fun time in life when things seemed so care free and happy. The times when you were able to stay up for hours just listening and talking to that person that gave you butterflies. Keep doing fun things! Regardless of whether or not you have children, don’t have children, are married, or just dating keep going and doing, don’t get stuck in a rut of staying at home and binge watching Netflix, sure that can be fun, but when you fall into a rut it is extremely hard to get out. And for gosh sakes TALK to one another! Women: men don’t understand that “Fine” means something is terribly wrong. Men: you don’t have to curl up in a ball every time you have a problem, we may not be able to fix your problem at work, but women love to just talk and listen to each other and we’d love to talk and listen to the one person we love the most.